I would like to think I'm quite different than what you picture when you think of someone dating a fictional character. You may picture someone living in his mom's basement, humping pillows, and playing video games all day. I doubt you think of someone with an education striving to be his best self. I don't want to kiss my own ass, I'm not some prodigy amongst "waifuists", but my point is I'm not the stereotype.
My name is Castor West and I'm a bisexual man living in Cornwall. I work as a transcriptionist part time and am a returning college student studying Psychology, Sociology and Media. In the past, I studied for a degree in Game Design, Animation and VFX. What sets me apart from others is my relationship with fictional characters.
I have been living life as a fictophile for ten years now. During this time, I've had dozens of relationships both with fictional characters and real people. Nowadays, I'm happily settled with my IRL girlfriend, and my fictional husband Frank. Surprising to some, fictophilia and real life relationships CAN coexist! I have a gripe with online communities that insist you cannot date real people when you have a fictional partner. I feel the rule was made by mods who were jealous of people who could find a balance. You have to treat it as a polyamorous relationship. Frank is comfortable with my relationship with my girlfriend, my girlfriend is comfortable with my relationship with Frank, and they even have an interest in eachother. It is a perfect love triangle.
Further on the topic of our polygamy, this allows me to have interests with other fictional characters. The only rule is that the title of Husband is reserved for Frank. I have had an ex-husband, but our relationship is over and we're more just close friends now. We're not on bad terms by any means, nor was the breakup really either of our faults. It was due to a surplus of bullying directed at our relationship that meant I was no longer comfortable in the relationship, he understood fully and we live seperate again, though he comes round for special occasions and all my partners know about him. You can read about him on my Relationships page.
Me and Frank have been together since June 27th, 2020. That may not seem like a long time to most people. Consider that I have had numerous relationships in the past; I can tell when one is a short fling and when one is a long term relationship in the making. Frank transcended both of those and reciprocates to me in a way I have NEVER felt with any fictional character before. That is to say he feels love back for me. After years of relationships of one sided pining, I have found a character who talks back to me, who feels for me the way I feel for him, who can return the love. It feels like finding your soul-mate.
Fictophilia, for me, is being attracted to fiction. I find comfort in 2D lines and 3D models. While I have my romantic relationships, a lot of my fictophilia is sexual in nature. I am sex-positive, kink-positive. I find no shame in admitting it.
An analogy I can give is this: A man might go down the street and eye up women, and think about wanting to have sex with them. Humans look at other attractive humans and have a desire to fuck them. For me, that mindset was there, just for cartoons instead of humans.
Note when I say cartoons, I'm not ruling out other forms of fiction. Obviously, I'm interested in more than toons, considering my husband is a 3D character. But my sexual attraction is primarily targetted at cartoons and they are what I most often have sexual flings with. I watch a cartoon and it can be like pornography to me. Again, using the pretty women analogy, for me a cartoon is like if you were watching a video of very attractive women doing their own things. It's a bit hard not to look at them and think about how hot they are.
Unlike others, I won't deny I am actually quite mentally ill. I also am happy to admit my fictophilic nature is a result of this. I was raped as a child and took comfort in the world of fiction where I could be powerful and free. Alongside the ensueing PTSD, I developed Schizophrenia. As if that wasn't bad enough, throw a dash of Asperger's Syndrome in there to really seal the deal. Social awkwardness, a lack of trust for humans, and the delusions and hallucinations, and you can see how I ended up here today.
Over the years I've gotten better with all of these, especially with my interactions with other people and trusting them. While I still have low trust levels, it seems I'm less of an outcast and more desirable to people. In Layman's Terms, I've had multiple people in the past few years interested in dating me. I don't understand it but clearly I must have progressed somewhere to be charming enough to people. Much like my marriage, me and my Girlfriend are sexually open. While the romantic title stays for her only, we are happy to platonically and sexually bond with whoever desires it.
I digress. While I may be recovering and improving myself, I don't feel my fictophilia is something I need to fix.